Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Tumbleweeds



I'm still looking for some random crap to write about. Unfortunately, this holiday was void of any family get-together disasters. Actually, it was probably one of the better Christmases because a bit of family drama has finally been left in the past.

The only interesting thing that happened, happened on Christmas Eve--my sister and I were driving to the gym to get our workout on (you know, to prepare for all those cookies we were about to eat/already had eaten/it didn't matter anyway because I still gained 5 pounds). The wind was unusually strong for West Tennessee, maxing out around 40mph. We passed a graveyard on our left when...all of a sudden...a tumbleweed shot out in front of our car! I slammed on the breaks and we both screamed.

"What the heck was that!" I said, flashing back to Fival Goes West.

Katie looked back and started laughing.

"It was a flower thing from the cemetery!"

No sooner had she said it that a Thanksgiving colored bouquet rolled out in front of me. I swerved to miss it, only to run over a poor little scarecrow lying in the middle of the road.

"I just ran over a scarecrow!" I shouted. And we burst out laughing again. "Poor thing! That's sad!"

Every time I hear the word scarecrow I think of my dad--that and the Wizard of Oz. Come to think of it, my dad's nose kind of looks like the Scarecrow's. It's not red; it's just big. And its okay for me to say that because he makes fun of my mom for having a pineapple sized head.

On Christmas Eve my family always goes out to eat and to a movie. Afterwards, we come home, decorate Christmas cookies, open one present, then watch movies. This year, instead of watching a movie right away, we decided to play Loaded Questions--a game that has a headline which reads: "Expose Yourself." Probably not the best game play with your parents.

Everything was all fine and dandy until we got to the last question: "What is your most annoying habit?"

"Oh," my mom said. "well your dad has a lot."

We finished writing our answers and handed them to Dad to read. Mom had to guess who wrote which answer.

"Number one!" he said. "Talking to fast.

"Number two...talking back to mom.

"And number three... asking, "do you want some?"

Mom fell on the floor laughing.

Now, you should know one thing before I continue this story. Every night at dinner, my dad tries to force me to eat more. It's always, "do you want more potatoes?" or "do you want some of my steak?" or "eat some peas." It's so annoying, but clearly that's not where my mother's mind was going.

"Mom," Katie said as my mom pounded her fists on the ground and shook with laughter. "What's so funny?"

I glanced over at Katie.

"Nothing!" I said. "he's talking about food!"

That only made things worse. My dad's face turned red and he couldn't breath under his chuckles, while mom shouted something about being scared for life.

"Well," I said, "you're the one who went there."

Oh yea....and I forgot one thing. My dad's AOL screen name is Scarecrow40, only he misspelled it as "Scarcrow," and this Christmas Eve, I truly was scared for life. Almost more than the time I.....well, I think I've already given you too much information.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

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