Walking

This post actually began on Wednesday night when I was working out at the ARC (Athletic and Recreation Center). Without even mentioning the less than aerobic aerobics class I attended, I hope to give you a little taste of the....unique...atmosphere that is the ARC by telling you about my walking experience.

I understand that unless you've participated in or watched the duck-waddling sport that is Olympic Speed Walking, walking, as subject matter for a blog, might be boring.

Oh Contrare!(sp?) On Wednesday night, I had finished my 30 minute stint on the elliptical and still had 25 minutes left on my podcast.

"Perfect!" I thought. "Just enough time to walk a mile or two around the track."

The ARC has a brown track that circles the entire second floor of the building: 6 1/2 laps= a mile.

I've walked on this track before, joining the other fitness-crazed and not-so-fitness-crazed individuals in a clockwise rotation, and I stepped onto the track with confidence to begin my trek.

At first, no one was around and I thought nothing about it until I saw an elderly gentleman in a white t-shirt walking towards me.

"That's funny!" I giggled in my head. "He probably doesn't know he's walking the wrong way!"

I passed him, smiled, and continued my walk. Up ahead, a skinny girl in a tank top jogged towards me.

"Weird," I thought. "Two people in one night, going the wrong way."

Next, I saw a group of people coming towards me: a middle aged couple, three teenage boys, and a jogger passing on their right.

What is going on?

I maneuvered my way through the herd as they gave me strange looks. Then it hit me....I was the one going the wrong way. Everyone else was moving in the other direction, and I was disrupting flow.

What the heck? Every other day people walk the other way!

I casually stepped off the track by ab workout equipment and started doing some crunches. I wanted to make it look like I had walked the wrong way on purpose, that i had taken a "short cut" to the ab machines.

This kind of reminds me of the time I made fun of a kid for swimming so far out into the ocean that he had to get rescued.

What made him think he could swim that far? Stupid kid.

The next thing I know, my boyfriend and I are caught in a rip-tide being swept out to sea and an ambulance is rolling onto the beach.

"You hear those sirens?" asked Grandpa Lifeguard as he struggled to pull me on a boogie board. "Those are for you.

I had planned to continue my shpeal about people and their strange walking habits. I was going to tell you that the next day, the current of people was flowing in its original direction. I was then going to tell you the story of a slow walking man down the halls of Stephens College at the True False film festival, but none of that seems that funny right now.

I recognize that I make fun of people way too much. Sometimes its for the sake of comedy (i.e. this blog) and others its simply to make myself feel better (maybe). Unfortunately, I often find myself to be the ultimate butt of the joke. However, that doesn't seem to stop me.

Maybe someday I'll learn my lesson, but until then....happy reading!!!